9S can't help but think aloud. "I wonder if the same thing would happen if there were multiple of my model walking around...?"
Maybe it would be weird, but if they deployed more models at once YoRHa could have covered more ground and progressed their war more quickly. Or were the multiple memories too difficult to reconcile and retain a sense of self? He almost wants to try, but YoRHa isn't part of his future any more so that's a thought process not worth pursuing.
Speaking of future...
9S rubs small circles on Rita's hand with his thumb. "Both of your halves reflected your feelings, right? But one of them was nervous and jumpy..." Handholding was something they readily fell into. To see 'Rita' pull away from it earlier had been a clear sign something had been off. "Are you worried about us?"
Multiple 9Ses...? Knowing that his bodies are effectively mass-produced, it's not completely out of the realm of possibility... but it's definitely easier for Rita, having just one of him around. Maybe he feels the same about her.
"Huh...?" That question seems to catch Rita off guard. "No--I mean, I don't think so..." Well, now she's thinking about it.
"I worry about lots of things. I've never been in a serious relationship before, so maybe there is a part of me that still... doesn't know what I want, or doesn't know how to proceed. That kind of thing." Was that it...? The fact that her dark half was full of uncertainties only makes it harder to figure out what (other than everything) she was so uncertain about.
"...You don't have to worry, though. If my light side was made up of all the parts of me that I wanted to keep, then it must mean something that she held on to... you know, the way I feel about you."
In the Athenaeum, he'd read about the memories of 2B and the first 9S. They hadn't seemed very close... But that had changed, hadn't it? Even though he doesn't remember any of the previous 9Ses, maybe... maybe there's some kind of quality to being alive that persists outside of the body.
Because somehow, not long after his first time meeting 2B, he knew that he would die for her. It made no logical sense for him to feel that way, not unless he knew her without knowing it becuase it was important to all the 9Ses before him.
(Is that what it means to have a soul?)
And maybe... maybe no matter what happens to Rita, no matter how she might change, she'll always feel the way she does about him. A feeling that persists beyong what is logical. Some kind of emotion he can't quite identify bubbles within him, his throat feeling tight.
"I'm glad," he murmurs, the words hard to force out of his mouth through the wall of emotion.
But there's a smile on his lips, his heart -- or at least, his fascimile of one -- light. Even in face of everything they'd been through together, a small part of him still thinks he's not worthy. She could discard him and it would be within her right to. But she won't and, and...
"Thank you, Rita." He leans forward to place a small kiss on her cheek. "For choosing me."
The touch of his lips on her cheek brings a small smile to Rita's face. Sharing a light kiss now and then is hardly a rare event between them these days, but there's still something about it that makes her heart flutter.
"I could say the same to you," she says, closing her eyes, as if to savor the moment. "Choosing to leave your old life behind... even considering the circumstances, it can't be easy. But I'm glad. Growing up, I've always been alone, and over time, some part of me started thinking that was how it'd always be. So what I'm saying is... thanks, for helping me change that."
A red tinge creeps into her complexion as she seems to grow self-aware of how sincere she's trying to be, and how weird it feels to actually say those kinds of things out loud. It's something she's still getting used to, but with 9S, it's somehow easier.
"I don't want you to regret that choice... and I don't ever want to leave you alone, the way I was," she continues, slipping her arms around him and easing into an embrace.
Growing up alone... his lifespan can't compare to Rita's, but he can understand it. From the very beginning, the moment of his 'birth', he'd been alone with only 21O at the end of a communications channel.
Things have changed. When he's with Rita, it feels like he can do anything.
9S leans into the embrace, hugging her back. Of course, they both know it will only be a matter of time before Rita's life will come to an end. And... despite their conversation not so long ago, he still doesn't know what he will do after that. But there'll always be a part of her with him all the time, so long as he keeps his memories.
"I'll never regret it," he says firmly. "Even when things are hard, I'll never regret being with you. Our time together... those are my most precious memories."
Rita stays like that, focusing on his warmth and his words. She believes him. But still...
"Maybe there's another way..." she murmurs thoughtfully. It's been on her mind for a while. She doesn't want to leave 9S alone, but she doesn't want him to shorten his life either. But with the fae, they have access to tools and powers far beyond what would normally be at their disposal. Maybe they could make a 'miracle' happen...
Pulling away from the embrace at last, Rita shakes her head, as if to dismiss that thought for now. "...I'll try to figure something out," is all she offers by way of clarification. And without delay, she changes the subject. "You know... I can afford to take some time away from my work. Maybe we should... I don't know, go out and do something." Like a date.
Hmm... He wanted to tell her it's okay, it's normal for humans to have a microscopic lifespan in comparison to an android's potential one, and that he's okay with that (except, not really). But the words are completely lost when Rita dangles a distraction right in front of him.
And of course he takes the bait, expression brightening as he pulls away. "Oh! I know!"
He already had an idea burning a hole in one of his memory units, though he doesn't know if Rita would like it.
"We could go to one of the bathouses together! With so many different kinds out there, I'm sure there's one for couples!"
He says nothing of the fact this idea was Lambert's (teasing) suggestion.
It's not a logical reaction, and she knows it. She's willing to seriously consider spending the rest of her life with 9S, but still gets all flustered over the idea of being naked around him? That's stupid, isn't it?
"M, maybe... we can go see what they have," she manages to stammer out.
Well, she didn't seem totally opposed to it, so that's already a better result than he had been expecting.
9S can't help but laugh as he leans over to take her hand. "Your face is turning red," he teases.
He casts his mind back to some of the old world data he'd consumed back when he was bored while waiting for his next mission. Too bad the androids weren't always able to separate fact from fiction...
"Maybe I could wash your wings? It must be hard for you to reach them properly."
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
branchandroot
no subject
Date: 2018-11-18 12:39 pm (UTC)Maybe it would be weird, but if they deployed more models at once YoRHa could have covered more ground and progressed their war more quickly. Or were the multiple memories too difficult to reconcile and retain a sense of self? He almost wants to try, but YoRHa isn't part of his future any more so that's a thought process not worth pursuing.
Speaking of future...
9S rubs small circles on Rita's hand with his thumb. "Both of your halves reflected your feelings, right? But one of them was nervous and jumpy..." Handholding was something they readily fell into. To see 'Rita' pull away from it earlier had been a clear sign something had been off. "Are you worried about us?"
no subject
Date: 2018-11-22 03:46 am (UTC)"Huh...?" That question seems to catch Rita off guard. "No--I mean, I don't think so..." Well, now she's thinking about it.
"I worry about lots of things. I've never been in a serious relationship before, so maybe there is a part of me that still... doesn't know what I want, or doesn't know how to proceed. That kind of thing." Was that it...? The fact that her dark half was full of uncertainties only makes it harder to figure out what (other than everything) she was so uncertain about.
"...You don't have to worry, though. If my light side was made up of all the parts of me that I wanted to keep, then it must mean something that she held on to... you know, the way I feel about you."
no subject
Date: 2018-12-16 08:12 am (UTC)Because somehow, not long after his first time meeting 2B, he knew that he would die for her. It made no logical sense for him to feel that way, not unless he knew her without knowing it becuase it was important to all the 9Ses before him.
(Is that what it means to have a soul?)
And maybe... maybe no matter what happens to Rita, no matter how she might change, she'll always feel the way she does about him. A feeling that persists beyong what is logical. Some kind of emotion he can't quite identify bubbles within him, his throat feeling tight.
"I'm glad," he murmurs, the words hard to force out of his mouth through the wall of emotion.
But there's a smile on his lips, his heart -- or at least, his fascimile of one -- light. Even in face of everything they'd been through together, a small part of him still thinks he's not worthy. She could discard him and it would be within her right to. But she won't and, and...
"Thank you, Rita." He leans forward to place a small kiss on her cheek. "For choosing me."
no subject
Date: 2019-01-14 05:25 am (UTC)"I could say the same to you," she says, closing her eyes, as if to savor the moment. "Choosing to leave your old life behind... even considering the circumstances, it can't be easy. But I'm glad. Growing up, I've always been alone, and over time, some part of me started thinking that was how it'd always be. So what I'm saying is... thanks, for helping me change that."
A red tinge creeps into her complexion as she seems to grow self-aware of how sincere she's trying to be, and how weird it feels to actually say those kinds of things out loud. It's something she's still getting used to, but with 9S, it's somehow easier.
"I don't want you to regret that choice... and I don't ever want to leave you alone, the way I was," she continues, slipping her arms around him and easing into an embrace.
no subject
Date: 2019-02-14 12:33 pm (UTC)Things have changed. When he's with Rita, it feels like he can do anything.
9S leans into the embrace, hugging her back. Of course, they both know it will only be a matter of time before Rita's life will come to an end. And... despite their conversation not so long ago, he still doesn't know what he will do after that. But there'll always be a part of her with him all the time, so long as he keeps his memories.
"I'll never regret it," he says firmly. "Even when things are hard, I'll never regret being with you. Our time together... those are my most precious memories."
no subject
Date: 2019-03-05 08:17 am (UTC)"Maybe there's another way..." she murmurs thoughtfully. It's been on her mind for a while. She doesn't want to leave 9S alone, but she doesn't want him to shorten his life either. But with the fae, they have access to tools and powers far beyond what would normally be at their disposal. Maybe they could make a 'miracle' happen...
Pulling away from the embrace at last, Rita shakes her head, as if to dismiss that thought for now. "...I'll try to figure something out," is all she offers by way of clarification. And without delay, she changes the subject. "You know... I can afford to take some time away from my work. Maybe we should... I don't know, go out and do something." Like a date.
no subject
Date: 2019-03-07 10:49 am (UTC)And of course he takes the bait, expression brightening as he pulls away. "Oh! I know!"
He already had an idea burning a hole in one of his memory units, though he doesn't know if Rita would like it.
"We could go to one of the bathouses together! With so many different kinds out there, I'm sure there's one for couples!"
He says nothing of the fact this idea was Lambert's (teasing) suggestion.
no subject
Date: 2019-03-13 10:33 pm (UTC)Rita's face quickly turns bright pink.
It's not a logical reaction, and she knows it. She's willing to seriously consider spending the rest of her life with 9S, but still gets all flustered over the idea of being naked around him? That's stupid, isn't it?
"M, maybe... we can go see what they have," she manages to stammer out.
no subject
Date: 2019-03-15 01:21 pm (UTC)9S can't help but laugh as he leans over to take her hand. "Your face is turning red," he teases.
He casts his mind back to some of the old world data he'd consumed back when he was bored while waiting for his next mission. Too bad the androids weren't always able to separate fact from fiction...
"Maybe I could wash your wings? It must be hard for you to reach them properly."